New research shows that singles who manage their friendship networks well are happier, less lonely, and more satisfied with life. Here’s what you need to know to build stronger, more fulfilling connections.
How Important Are Friendships for Happiness and Well-Being?
Friendships are more important than many people realize, especially for those who are single and do not have a romantic partner to rely on for emotional support.
According to a new study by Hu and colleagues, published in Personal Relationships, the ability to manage and maintain a strong friendship network may be one of the most powerful predictors of happiness and well-being among single adults.
Do Singles Really Struggle More with Happiness?
Although research often shows that married people report higher average levels of well-being, this isn’t true for everyone. In particular, voluntarily single individuals (those who actively choose to remain single) can be just as happy, or even happier, than their married counterparts.
However, involuntary singles tend to report lower life satisfaction. This is particularly true of singles who are older, men, and in poorer health.
Many of the happiest singles appear to have strong, positive interpersonal relationships, including with family and friends. Indeed, friends play a bigger role in the lives of unpartnered compared to partnered individuals.
What the New Study Explored
Hu et al. examined 10 specific friendship characteristics and how they relate to three key aspects of well-being:
- Loneliness: Lacking close relationships, feeling left out, emotionally distant, and unable to belong.
- Companionship: Having meaningful company in pleasurable social activities.
- Life satisfaction: Subjective evaluation of one’s quality of life compared to one’s standards and ideals.
Key Friendship Factors That Impact Well-Being
The 10 indicators that the researchers examined consisted of friendship network size, network density, losing old friends, making new friends, network adaptability, perceived support availability, and four dimensions of communication (mediated, face-to-face, routine, and time spent).
They tested their hypotheses in two samples: N1: 552 American adults (39 years average, 18-86 range). N2: 391 American adults (37 years average, range of 18-74 years). The majority of participants were White, female, and heterosexual.
The researchers found the strongest evidence for the following factor: low network inadaptability. In other words, of particular importance was the ability to flexibly manage one’s friendships over time.
The Big Takeaway: Friendship Flexibility Matters Most
In two large samples of U.S. adults, those who reported low network inadaptability and thus better navigation of their social networks (i.e., ease of keeping old friends and making new ones) experienced less loneliness, more companionship, and higher life satisfaction.
This suggests it is not just who you know, but how actively and flexibly you engage with your network.
Network adaptability is related to being structurally integrated. Singles who have a sufficient number of good friends and feel capable of adapting to changes in their friendship network are considered structurally well-integrated. They are more likely to feel they can access different forms of support as needed.
Why This Matters for Singles
Being single does not mean being alone. But it means your emotional resources depend more heavily on friendships and other non-romantic ties. If you are not nurturing these connections, you might experience:
- Isolation and depression.
- Loneliness when old friends move, marry, or change jobs.
- Difficulty forming new bonds.
- More stress during life transitions.
But if you are socially flexible and can actively manage your friendships, you maintain emotional security and a sense of belonging, even without a romantic partner.
It should be noted, however, that the research reviewed is correlational, not causal. This means we can’t say for sure which causes which: Does poor friendship management lead to lower well-being? Or does poor well-being make friendships harder to manage? Or do both influence each other?
Perhaps your well-being and your friendships are closely linked, and they reinforce each other over time.
If so, in order to facilitate making and keeping friends, it is important to maintain your mental and physical well-being. How? Through practices such as regular exercise, healthy eating, sufficient sleep, and living a meaningful life.
Still, the influence of friendship adaptability on emotional resilience is undeniable. As Hu and colleagues note, “cultivating a feeling that support is available when needed can be relevant to feeling companied,” and “maintaining old friendships is relevant to avoiding feeling lonely.”
How to Apply This in Real Life (Especially If You Are Single)
If you are single, spend some time evaluating your social network. These include not only your nuclear and extended family but also neighbors, coworkers, classmates, and of course, friends.
Ask yourself:
- Do I feel supported by my friends?
- Am I staying in touch with old friends? Do I know how?
- Am I adaptable when friendships change?
If the answer to some of these is “no,” focus on building your friendship adaptability to improve your social well-being and emotional resilience. Here’s how:
- Reconnect with old friends to reduce loneliness.
- Communicate with friends regularly in meaningful ways.
- Make an effort to meet new people and broaden your circle.
- Actively but flexibly adapt as your circle evolves.
- Make sure you have access to different types of support when needed.
Friendship Is the Hidden Key to Happiness for Singles
For those of you who are romantically unattached, your ability to cultivate strong friendships may be your most powerful tool for happiness, health, and emotional resilience.
You do not need a romantic partner to thrive, but just as romantic partners need to feel supported by their significant other, you do need supportive, meaningful, and flexible relationships.
So stay connected, nurture the bonds you have, and, most importantly, actively manage your circle of friends as life changes. This is essential for your health, happiness, and well-being.
